A Lesson in Angst
by Flamingo Feathers
Summary: Jo has been thrown into a surreal alternate universe, where angsty music plays full blast and she is the only one who can spot the plotholes. Can she convince the PPC she's not a Sue? Or will she go deaf first?


**Author's Note: **The idea for this story had been floating around in my head for quite a while. I'd written most of what you see here, not knowing where to go with it, when I decided to make it into an Angsty!Sue-songfic parody.   
  
This chapter is just a short introduction to the character and her situation. Note that I have nothing against Avril Lavigne or any of the other artists in this fic - I just hate how those songs are in almost every single Sue!   
  
_This fic is not intended to hurt any other story in particular. It is only parodying the genre. Apologies for any misconceptions._  
  
**Disclaimer: **I do not own Avril Lavigne or the song I'm With You, thank Eru.  


**  
A Lesson In Angst  
_ The Misguided Misadventures of a Troubled Teen  
  
_****Chapter One: I'm With You...and I Wish I Wasn't  
  
**_  
...It's a damn cold night,  
Trying to figure out this life,  
Won't you take me by the hand  
Take me somewhere new...  
_

  
Jo clamped her hands over her ears. Oh God no. Oh please stop. For the love of all that is good and holy, stop!   
  


_...Don't know who you are, but  
I'm with you...  
_

  
Please! Aaaaaah! The angsty music began to fade, and she experimentally took her hands off her ears. When she was sure no pop princess' digitally altered voice would further disrupt her night's rest, she jammed a pillow over her throbbing ears and drifted back to sleep.  
  


* * *  


  
The next morning, as usual, Jo looked like the living dead. She never got any sleep any more, after ...It... had started to intrude on her dreams as well as her waking life. It was worse than the time her doctor had given her too much morphine for an operation and she saw dancing llamas in her head for a week. The llamas had at least left her alone at night. But now, the angsty pop songs constantly reverberated through her head.  
  
It had started a few weeks ago. Apparently someone had decided that she would make a great Angsty Teen(tm) and dropped her in a parallel universe where she was a sk8er gurl. Her life now ran like a low-budget movie, complete with cheap special effects, many, many plotholes, desperate overacting ...and a soundtrack. No one had considered that she had had a life back in the Real World.  
  
Look on the bright side, Jo muttered to herself. At least it ain't country. She shut her eyes and waited for the Effects to dress her. In a few minutes, she was all ready to go - baggy pants and an uncomfortably tight t-shirt. It wasn't what she wanted to be wearing, of course, but it wasn't like she had a choice in the matter. She didn't have a choice in anything anymore.   
  
The many chains dangling from her pants jingled as she jumped through a plothole and landed in the kitchen, as she did every morning. She didn't know if her surreal alternate-universe house even _had_ a staircase.  
  
Morning, little honeybear!   
  
Jo flinched at the butchering of her mother's sweet personality. She loved her real mother. They used to talk about everything together. Her surreal-alterworld-mother, on the other hand, didn't understand her and didn't try. She was just a prop, used to make Jo's life appear worse to ...whoever was watching. She was sure that her new life was being staged for _someone's _entertainment. Someone with a twisted and sadistic sense of humor.  
  
As she ate her pancakes (actually, she wasn't sure if they were _real_ pancakes, and they may have been only an illusion), the soundtrack started to play again. Her hands involuntarily flew to her ears, earning a concerned look from who didn't seem to hear it. Jo noticed, however, that she started to choreograph her movements to match the music.  
  


_I'm standing on a bridge,  
I'm waiting in the dark,  
I thought that you'd be here by now.  
  
_

She suddenly found that she had no appetite for the almost-pancakes anymore.  


_  
There's nothing but the rain,  
No footsteps on the ground,  
I'm listening but there's no sound...  
  
_

Jo couldn't take it any longer. She'd had _enough. _She was _done_ with living a life that wasn't hers. She was _finished_ with having to listen to angsty pop music. And she was most definitely _not _going to put up with this her entire life.   


_  
Isn't anyone trying to find me?_  


  
This was it. This was War. War on Angst! She would show them who was in charge of her life.  


_  
Won't somebody come take me home...?_  


  
Having made this resolution, Jo found the strength to yell at the music, something she'd been wanting to do for a long time now.  
  
_HEY AVRIL! YOU'VE BEEN STOOD UP! GET OVER IT!  
  
_

* * *  
  


And infinitely far away, yet close enough to touch without extending a hand, someone (or something) chuckled. It laughed, the horrible sound resonating through Jo's entire world. You think you can declare war on _me?_ We shall see about that. I think its time for Miss Johanna Thompson to discover who's _really _in charge here...  
  
Yes, things were about to get worse for Jo. Very much worse.  
  
**So...what'd you think? Please leave some constructive criticism. Mindless praise is fine and dandy, but does not help one grow as a writer.   
  
Oh, and all flames MUST be obscene enough to provide sufficient MST fodder. **


End file.
